Last week, I was in Arkansas for the first annual Fort Smith Fearless Caregiver Conference and in Tulsa for the Alzheimer’s Association’s regional conference. The topics discussed at both events were wide-reaching and powerful. As usual, I learned much from listening to family caregivers. One topic that we spent a good deal of time on at both events was what I like to call the art of becoming the “CEO of Caring for Momma, Inc.” And, as any good CEO would do, the caregiver analyzes what support is needed, from whom and asks for it. Coincidently, I received a note last week from a reader that says it as well as it can be said. Hmmm, maybe there are no coincidences.

Hi Gary,

I want to say thank you for all that you do for the caregiver. Being able just to read the newsletters and attend the conferences gives very helpful tips and encouragement to us all. Here are just a few things that I do from time to time to help develop "me" time.

I let go of the excuses that I make. Sometimes as caregivers we find it less of a hassle to do everything ourselves and not ask for help. Sometimes it feels that asking for help inconveniences us just as much as it does others.  Having to make all the arrangements seems like a lot of work.  When I feel like I need a break, I don't allow myself to say, “I don't want to be a bother.” I ask for it.
 
I know someone else mentioned this; I also take half days from work on Fridays.  Being able to be at your own pace and just enjoy what it is you want to do is very relaxing.  It may be to shop, catch a movie, or just sit on a friend’s sofa while they are not there and take a personal breather.
 
One thing new that I did this year was to take one "full" day to myself.  I left that morning and did not come back until late that night.  If you don't have "respite hours" that you can use for that, seek out a friend or family member that will give up their day to spend with your loved one.
 
Lastly, Gary, I always try to take periodic trips during the year.  They don't have to be very far, but at least two full days where I am away from home with no calls asking how to do this and that;  just time alone for me.
 
Again, thanks for answering the call of taking care of the caregiver.
 
Nancy P.

Couldn’t have said it better myself, Nancy.

 

 

Gary Barg
Editor-in-Chief
gary@caregiver.com