I received a call yesterday from my good
friend, Bob. He is the owner of the
Griswold Special Care franchise in Miami and was
quite concerned after having gotten word of the
second male family caregiver suicide in the
community in as many months. I have known Bob
for many years, his wife having been my sister’s
best friend as children, and our usual
conversations run from lively political
discussions to shared jokes and cartoons that
can be found online. This time, he was calling
to sound an alarm bell. He was most
concerned that these two gentlemen in particular
seemed to be easily handling the things that
came their way as family caregivers.
In researching his concern, I ran across an
article written by Donna Cohen, Ph.D., a noted
caregiving author and professor at the
University of South Florida. Dr. Cohen’s
article was entitled “Homicide-Suicide in Older
Persons: How You Can Help Prevent a Tragedy.”
I think it applies here.
Some good advice from Dr. Cohen:
What to Do if You See Signs
- Do not be afraid to ask if the older
person has thought about suicide or
homicide-suicide. You will not be giving
them new ideas.
- Do not act surprised or shocked. This
will make them withdraw from you. Continue
talking and ask how you can help.
- Offer hope that alternatives are
available. Do not offer glib reassurance. It
may make the person believe that you do not
understand.
- Get involved. Become available. Show
interest and support. If you cannot do this,
find someone who can, such as a neighbor or
a minister, priest, or rabbi.
- Ask whether there are guns in the house.
Ask the person what plans they have to die.
The more detailed the plan, the higher the
risk.
- Remove guns and other methods to kill.
- Do not be sworn to secrecy. Get help
from persons or agencies that specialize in
crisis intervention.
- Call a crisis hotline in your area or
seek the help of a geriatric specialist. Do
not try to do things by yourself.
Finding Help
There is
help in the community. If you believe there is a
risk for homicide-suicide, contact a
professional immediately. Call a suicide crisis
center, a crisis hotline, a family physician, a
psychiatric or medical emergency room, or a
community mental health center listed in the
yellow pages of your phone book.
Thanks,
Bob, for the call. Thanks, Dr. Cohen, for the
good advice.
Take care
Gary Barg
Editor-in-Chief
gary@caregiver.com
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Today's Caregiver magazine - July/August Issue
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Feature Article |
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Linking the Past to the Present -
The Benefits of Reminiscing |
By Kristine Dwyer, Staff Writer
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Uncle Joe recalls the good old days
when a Ford coupe was $500, gasoline
cost 19 cents a gallon, a postage
stamp was three cents, and penny
candy was a treat. Grandma Millie
tells stories about growing up on
the farm and walking three miles to
school every day......Continued
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Care Verse |
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Silver Tendrils About My Heart
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By Sherry Norman
Hairbrush running through long sliver hair
Snapping, crackling, sparking shining bright
Curling about fingers with a life of its own
Tendrils wrapping tight like those about my
heart ...Continued
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Guest Column |
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When and How To Say "No" to
Caregiving
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By Deborah Colgan
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How does a caregiver know when he or she can
no longer manage the daily caregiving routines
and planning responsibilities? What signals
alert the caregiver that he or she is in trouble
of getting lost in caregiving?...Continued
(Do you have a story?
Tell us.)
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Caretips |
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Home Care Tips for Elderly Loved
Ones |
By Jennifer B. Buckley
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If you are caring
for an elderly loved one at home,
you should make them as comfortable
and safe as possible. This can
reduce stress for you, as well as,
your loved-one. The more secure your
loved-one feels, the less the
likelihood of them becoming
confused, aggressive, or agitated. ...Continued
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Carenotes |
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A friend of mine was
recently contacted by a
company that wanted her to
attend a seminar. The
subject of the seminar had
to do with a benefit to
veterans called the
Veteran's Aid and Assistance
Pension program.
She
went to the seminar (which
was held by a private
company, not the Veteran's
Aid and Assistance program
itself.) The speaker there
indicated that he felt he
could help get her husband
(a disabled veteran) into
this program, even if her
family's assets were over
the qualifying limit for
eligibility.
My
friend was a bit skeptical
and contacted the Veteran's
Aid organization itself
(www.veteranaid.org). Their
representative suggested
being aware that if the
person/company hosting the
seminar was trying to sell
some investments, that they
would likely have their own
best interests at heart.
However, the Veteran's
Aid and Assistance pension
itself appears to be a real,
if little-known, benefit
available to qualifying
veterans.
Just
wondering if anyone out
there has ever heard of this
benefit and has qualified
for it. If so, perhaps you
have additional information
that could benefit others
and/or save them some time.
Best wishes.
Answer This Week's CareNote
P.S. If you are a
member of our discussion
forum, you can continue this
discussion there
http://forum.caregiver.com
or register to become a
member so you can
contribute. Click on
the Injured Veterans link.
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